Smelly Showdown: Which Cheese Will Claim This Title?

Smelliest Cheeses

Since the beginning of time, people connected cheeses to their taste and the way they smell. It’s shown in many cartoons and many stereotypical cheese situations where the cheese is looked upon as smelly grocery. It’s something that even now, years later, this precious food can’t get rid of. And that’s okay. What people don’t realize is that usually, the smellier the cheese is, the better. That means that it’s super unique and that it offers so much more than a regular cheese which you can buy in the supermarket. 

While investigating the smelliest cheese, we stumbled upon a load of information. Many different claims that weren’t exactly objective. French people think that they have the smelliest cheese, Spain that they do, and so on.

As you can see, people pretty much fight for this throne and wish to emphasize that their cheese is the smelliest there is. This is a clear indicator that picking the cheese, which will be declared the king of stinky cheeses, isn’t going to be an easy process and that we need to put a lot of work and investigation (and putting our French genes aside) into it. 

Therefore, we concluded. Bellow, we will give you a list of 5 kinds of cheese that are somewhat picked as the smelliest cheeses out there. Keep in mind that we tried all of them, and therefore we aren’t making this list blindfolded (or blindnosed should we say).

1. Rainbow’s Gold

This cheese is particular. When we first saw it and smelled it, we thought that it was a joke. We felt that it was made by someone in the laboratory who had only one job – to create a smelly cheese. It turns out that it wasn’t designed like that (surprise?) and that it has some history to it. It’s made from unpasteurized cow’s milk in England with an exciting process. When Rainbow’s gold is created, every single day, it’s fermented for several weeks with something called “golden ale.” This process makes it so smelly that you can probably see that the air color has changed around it when you look at it. 

It smells a lot like sweat. Imagine that someone has been walking for days in the same pair of socks during the summer heats. And then they take it off and let you smell them. Disgusting yeah. Another picturesque explanation about the smell is that it resembles an underside of a rubber wristwatch in the summer. The taste is awful, as well. It tastes like someone forgot cheddar for a couple of decades in the summer heat in some barn in the countryside. All in all, its taste resembles its smell.

2. Morbier

Morbier cheese comes from high mountains in the French countryside. It’s recognizable because it has a “line” of ash in the middle of it. It’s made from two different types of milk. The morning one and the evening one. It’s a pretty big deal to create this cheese, and it isn’t effortless. Someone might think why in the world would someone waste so much time to create such a cheese when it smells like pure garbage. But hey, humans are weird. Nowadays, this cheese isn’t made as it was in the old days. It’s created only with one type of milk, and manufacturers just add a layer of “ash” for its charismatic and distinctive look. 

As for the smell, it pretty much smells like dead grass. You know when someone cuts the grass in the summer heat and then piles it up together. Do you know that smell? You can sense it miles away. It doesn’t taste THAT bad, though. It’s creamy, but it doesn’t feel right. It doesn’t taste that bad, but it doesn’t taste even that good. Kind of some anonymous cheese that you will eat and forget about if there wasn’t for the smell.

3. Stinking Bishop

You can see by its name that this cheese isn’t made to be just regular. It’s stinky. And it stinks a lot. Another interesting fact about this cheese is that it is tough to break. Like, it could be even a hundred degrees outside, this cheese is tough to bend and break in parts. As for the smell? Well, Englishmen know how to make smelly cheese.

There is a local legend about it. It says that in the World War, this cheese was given to the dying soldiers to smell to get back in life since it feels worse than death. That’s how bad it is. Many people describe its smell as a flesh that started to rot. Or like a cloud of stale cigar smoke. Many interesting descriptions are found on the Internet, but you need to try it out before picking the story you like the most. As for the taste, it tastes like outdated cream cheese. People say that the flavor stays so long in the mouth that people often scrape their tongs with a knife. Pretty bad.

4. Cados

Cados is interesting. It’s a sort of gourmet cheese. It’s a Camembert, a famous cheese, which is soaked in Calvados liqueur. This liqueurs treatment is what gives it a specific smell. Being the only cheese that combines alcohol on this list, the smell is pretty unique as well. It smells like a drunken hillbilly. It’s so soaked in alcohol that if you aren’t an alcoholic, you won’t even be able to taste a small portion of this cheese. We could see that some people would like this cheese, but as for us, we needed to pass. This cheese is something like a sponge. It soaks so much of the alcohol that it will probably become one if you leave it for a couple of decades. So when you come back, you’ll have an awful cheesecohol type beverage. We can only imagine what mess that would be. 

5. Epoisse

Epoisse cheese is made of cow’s milk. It’s so pungent that it’s BANNED on the French public transport. Seriously, if you come up with an idea to buy this cheese and then enter a metro or a bus, you’re walking home or taking a cab. That’s how bad it smells. And as a cherry on top, it’s completely illegal in the U.S. Meaning, if you somehow get this cheese in the states, you’re going to jail pal. No discussion. As for the smell, people describe its smell so strongly that it closes the sinuses slightly. It smells like tons of eggs that are rotten and started to evaporate. It’s so bad that even more countries are in the process of banning it. Yuck! 

The King

These cheeses are just some in the world which could be on top of the smelly list. Keep in mind that there are a lot more of them that we didn’t happen to mention. Some could say that there are more smelly cheese options in the world than regular ones. It’s pretty insane. So, if we would pick the one on the list, we would be pretty subjective. Every single one of them has an element that differs from the rest of the group.

Even if you are into smelly cheeses, you need to taste them on your own and come to a verdict. We bet that some of them won’t even be able to eat since they are so awful that your nose won’t also stand it. But, if you are a trained individual and smelly cheese isn’t a big thing for you, then keep smelling! And when you finish, tell us what your verdict is. We would like to collect all information from our readers and come to a single conclusion to pick the smelliest cheese out there.

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